You and your spouse may have a friendly relationship where you can talk amicably about most things regarding your divorce in California. Though you and your partner have good intentions of working things out through mediation, there is always the possibility of disagreements occurring that can stall the negotiations.

When an impasse occurs between spouses during mediation proceedings, it can affect all progress made up until that point. You cannot rely on a mediator to choose a side or offer advice that might benefit one side over the other. The success of the mediation process relies on your ability to navigate through challenging issues to arrive at a workable solution that is most beneficial to you and your spouse. One way to handle the mediation process is to prepare for it.

Consider more than your needs and desires. Ideally, you may feel your interests are the most important. However, ask yourself what you can offer in the negotiations to make your spouse more receptive to meeting them. Take their emotions and situation into consideration as well. Ask questions and encourage your partner to do the same. Keep an open mind. Structure your demands and communication so they are nonaggressive in nature and encourage respectful responses.

Know your triggers and avoid your partner’s. Marriage is about compromise, so is mediation. Compromise is not possible when both parties are pushing each other’s buttons and saying things that provoke feelings of hurt and anger. Take time to identify issues, words and even body language that you tend to react poorly to and work to avoid them. Establish words to use to help you and your partner cool down if the talks start to breakdown. This is general information only and is not intended to provide legal advice.

Source: NerdWallet, “5 Divorce Mistakes That Can Cost You,” accessed June 10, 2019